Jedi Chaos
by JediLuminaraUnduli
Summary: Anakin get beat up by girls. Obi Wan tries to help. Small things become big. Yoda wants revenge. A little random. Some might be lots of Obi Wan and Anakin humiliation. Review, please!
1. Jedi Chaos I:The Trouble With Anakin

Jedi Chaos

**Jedi Chaos**

Summary: Anakin get beat up by girls. Obi Wan tries to help. A little random.

PG:G/ K+ for very mild violence

AN: My first fanfic online! Please be nice! No flaming please. Constructive criticism is OK. Thnx to all who review!

Disclaimer: I do not own Star Wars and its characters. George Lucas does.

Anakin Skywalker half-ran, half-limped into his former Master's room as quickly as he could. He skidded to a halt and panted, gasping for breath.

Obi Wan walked in at that very moment. He stared at Anakin. "What are you doing in my quarters?"

"Looking (pant) for (pant-gasp-pant) you!"

"Why? Did you want something?"

"Yes. I need HELP!!"

"Help with…?"

Anakin completely ignored Obi Wan. He was now trying to stretch his right leg out, which was at a strange angle. He could feel the muscles in his leg scream in protest as he tried to yank it straight.

Obi Wan watched Anakin attempt (and fail) to get his leg back in order. As he observed him, he noticed that he also had many other wounds and multiple bruises. He wondered what Anakin had gotten himself into.

"Where did you get that injury?" he asked. "It looks pretty bad."

Anakin looked terrified at that moment. "It was... It was…"

He glanced around nervously and then leaned forward and whispered in Obi Wan's ear.

"_Them_."

"Huh?"

"Th-th-the g-girls…"

Obi Wan stared at him. "You're saying that _girls_ did this to you."

Anakin nodded.

"You're serious."

Anakin nodded again, but much more vigorously this time.

Obi Wan stared at him and then burst out laughing. "HA! You got beat up by a GIRL!!"

Anakin pouted. "Not just one. It was a whole gang of them."

"What did you do to make them angry? Did you provoke them in some way? If you did, you'd better watch out. You'll never become Darth Vader if you joined the Force in just Episode II."

Anakin looked at him for a long time. "Why do _I_ always have to be the bad guy? I mean, George Lucas made me marry Padme, I turned into a Sith, and also tried to turn my future son into a Sith. Why ME?!" He ended the last words in a shout.

Obi Wan gave him The Look. Anakin hated The Look. It was the kind only Obi Wan could do, the type that made you feel dorky and cuckoo. He had attempted it many times before, but that only made people think he was mental.

"So… why'd the girls beat you up?"

"I don't wanna talk about it."

"Why?"

Ignoring, Obi Wan's question, Anakin instead changed the subject. "Did you know Master Windu's trying to grow hair again?"

Going along with Anakin's stalling, Obi Wan feigned surprise and said, "Really? He only does that, oh, every other day!"

"Don't be sarcastic. It make me feel like you're giving me The Look verbally."

"I am."

"Harrumph."

"Don't 'harrumph', Anakin. It makes you sound like the old troll."

"No it doesn't. And I will harrumph if I want. Harrumph."

"So why did the girls beat you up? Did you say some insult to them or irritate them in some way? They can be deadly, you know. Especially Yaddle and Shaak Ti. Aayla Secura's pretty nasty in a temper too, you know."

Anakin winced. "I know that all to well, Master."

"So why-"

"Okay! I'll tell you. They beat me up because—"

HA! A cliffhanger! I'm sooo evil. Is it worth continuing? Please review, no flaming, this is my very first fanfic that I'm posting online. Pleasey-please-please be nice :).


	2. Jedi Chaos II: The Danger Arises

Jedi Chaos Part II: The Culprits

**Jedi Chaos Part II: The Danger Arises**

Summary: Anakin get beat up by girls. Obi Wan tries to help. A little random.

PG:G/ K+ for very mild violence

AN: My first fanfic online! Please be nice! No flaming please. Constructive criticism is OK. Thnx to all who reviewed! Reviews make me happy :)

Disclaimer: I do not own Star Wars and its characters. George Lucas does. I also do not own Harry Potter and its characters. JK Rowling does.

--

"Okay! I'll tell you. They beat me up because I tried to hit on them and ask them to go with me to Friday night's dance."

Obi Wan stared. "I didn't think the injuries would be that serious. Emotionally and maybe mentally, but…" He trailed off as he took in Anakin's other wounds.

"So who did it?"

Anakin gulped, and said, in a trembling voice, "Shaak Ti, Aayla Secura, Luminara Unduli, Barriss Offee, and Siri Tachi."

By the time Anakin had reached the third name, Obi Wan was already shaking his head. "You have to start _small_, Anakin. Go with someone like Yaddle, who's like, 800 years old. Pick someone not that good and slowly work your way up. That was always your biggest flaw; your impatience."

Anakin groaned. "But if I ask Yaddle, Yoda will beat me up!"

Obi Wan snorted. "Yeah, right! What are you the Chosen One for, then? If you can't beat an elderly and weak (physically) 800+ year old troll, you'll never make it past the Clone Wars. "

Somewhere farther away, in the Council room, Yoda perked up his ears, listened for a bit, and then turned to Mace, saying, "Swear, I do, that someone just called me elderly, they did. Obi Wan Kenobi, I believe it was. Teach him a lesson, I shall."

With that, he hobbled out the door.

_--_

_Back in Obi Wan's quarters….._

Obi Wan finished putting the last band-aid on Anakin's head. He stood back and surveyed his work.

"H-how do I look?" Anakin asked nervously.

Obi Wan grinned. "Like Voldemort from Harry Potter."

Anakin looked confused. "Voldemort? Who's that?"

Obi Wan sighed. "Anakin, you need to learn to read. Harry Potter, hello?! One of the BEST books on the Earth."

Anakin looked even more muddled. "Earth?"

Obi Wan shook his head. "Never mind. But really, you look like a mummy from Egypt."

"Where's Egypt?"

Obi Wan just patted Anakin on the back. "Don't worry; you'll discover a thing called reading one day."

Anakin looked indignant. "I do SO know how to read."

Obi Wan looked doubtful.

"Okay, so I get the I's, U's, and A's mixed up a lot." He admitted. "But that doesn't mean I'm not intelligent."

Obi Wan drew his breath in, really slowly. Then, he exhaled even slower, like those people at the stress management classes.

Finally, he said, "So do you have a date for Friday night, or what?"

Anakin shook his head.

"What EXACTLY happened?"

Anakin started his sad tale. "I went down to the cantina for… a drink. Garen Muln promised me that I wouldn't get drunk and lose my reputation-" (At this point, Obi Wan interrupted, "What reputation?") "- of being the BEST lightsabre wielder of the galaxy. So maybe I had a drink. Or two. Or three. Okay, so I had six bottles of Corellian wine. Garen said it was okay, but after…" He shuddered. "So he said that we should get a date for Friday. I went first to Aayla Secura. I don't know what happened, but one minute I was standing, and the next, I wasn't, and I had a lightsabre swiping at me. So I ducked and ran out of the bar. Garen and I went up to the Luminara's quarters. We kinda… barged in. Anyway, Shaak Ti, Luminara, Siri Tachi and Barriss Offee were in there. We were just standing there (Okay, maybe not just standing, maybe acting a bit… drunk. Which we were.) and in like, 5 seconds, Shaak Ti sent me flying with a Force push, and Siri had here lightsabre up to my neck. Luminara and Barriss had Garen in a closet, and they were talking to him in low tones. I don't know why. I still don't even know how I got out alive… Oh, right, they pushed me out the window… just before Shaak Ti broke my leg. And Luminara bashed my head."

After his most woeful tale of epic (And a bit pathetic) tragedy, Anakin whimpered and rubbed his head and leg pitifully. Then, he dropped to the ground and grabbed Obi Wan's leg, in the process, stretching the chain that Obi Wan had put on his leg for his and Anakin's safety.

"Augh! Get off! What you're doing reminds me of when you throw Palpatine down the elevator shaft."

Anakin muttered, "I don't know how I even managed to move him! How much does he weigh, like 8000 pounds?"

Obi Wan shrugged. "Not MY problem. I'm already gone by then."

"So will you help me?"

"Help you do what?"

"Get a date."

"No."

"Why?"

"Because I don't benefit from it. If I got 5 credits…"

Anakin reached deep into his pocket. He pulled out a few pieces of lint, some fuzzy-looking pieces of mold, then some really, really smelly (like a sandwich in a hot locker for 6 months) credits and bills.

He peeled off 5 and handed them to Obi Wan. "Now help me."

Obi Wan nodded. "I'll have a date for you ready in a few hours."

--

Obi Wan burst into the room. "I've got it!"

"Who?" Anakin asked, jumping up and falling down because of his broken leg.

Obi Wan leaned close, and whispered like he was telling a secret. "Adi… Gallia."

Anakin gasped. "You mean that chic on the Council who wears a dumb headpiece that the author probably designed because he was bored?!"

Obi Wan nodded seriously. "That's the one," he confirmed. "She's totally all about you."

Anakin glared at Obi Wan. "Why couldn't you get me a hottie, like Shaak Ti, or Aayla Secura? Why-" He suddenly looked suspicious. "Who're YOU going with?"

Obi Wan turned red. "Ah-ah I can't tell you."

Anakin suddenly looked smug. "It's Siri Tachi, isn't it?"

Obi Wan looked sad. "No. She refused to come to the dance. She said it 'wasn't her thing'."

"So who…"

"Yaddle."

"Pardon?"

"Yaddle. Y-A-D-D-L-E."

Anakin did some sort of spastic motion which involved his limbs flaying wildly (Except his leg, which was broken and chained to the floor so he couldn't hurt anyone. Finally, he looked up and his face was full of glee and…

"Oh no. Ohhhhhhh no."

Anakin whooped with laughter. "Yaddle! You got _Yaddle_! Of all the female Jedi in the Order, you got YADDLE!!"

Obi Wan blushed and muttered something about 'the last resort'.

"So all the other girls refused?"

Obi Wan nodded, still crimson.

Anakin's mouth opened in a soundless wail of laughter. Obi Wan groaned. This could be bad.

--

Meanwhile, while Anakin was teasing poor Obi Wan (you gotta admit Yaddle's a bit old for anyone but Yoda), Yoda himself was hobbling down the hall.

"Obi Wan Kenobi, I must find. Teach him a lesson he shan't soon forget, I will. Steal my girlfriend- I mean _ex_-girlfriend and called me an old troll, he did. Forget, I shall not." he mumbled as he limped.

At that moment, Yaddle passed by, and said, "Never your girlfriend, I was. Broke up with you 400 years ago, I did. Forget again, you did. Too stubborn, you are. Like you, I do not. Get a life, you should."

Yoda froze and said, very slowly, "Like me you do not? Who you like, I would like to know."

Yaddle snorted superiorly. "Mace Windu or Obi Wan Kenobi of course. Like YOU, I would not. Handsome, they are. Good-looking, you are not."

Yoda ignored this, and stroked his chin. He added to his mental reminders to give Obi Wan a double whammy and then Windu.

Then, he continued his shuffle down the hallway.

--

What will Yoda do? How will Anakin manage to get out of Friday's date with an obsessed fangirl? Will Obi Wan find out about Yoda's wrath before it's too late? All in the next chapter (and more!)! Reviews please!! Thanks to all who review!!


	3. Jedi Chaos III:Yoda's Wrath

Jedi Chaos Part III: Yoda's Wrath

**Jedi Chaos Part III: Yoda's Wrath**

Summary: Anakin get beat up by girls. Obi Wan tries to help. A little random.

PG:G/ K+ for very mild violence

AN: My first fanfic online! Please be nice! No flaming please. Constructive criticism is OK. Thnx to all who reviewed!

Disclaimer: I do not own Star Wars and its characters. George Lucas does. I also don't own Charming toilet paper. And I do not own SOS by the Jonas Brothers.

--

After Obi Wan had left, Anakin's brain began to race. Friday night was fast approaching, and he needed to think of an excuse – fast.

"Injuries, no… healers took care of that, not feeling good, no…. Obi Wan would probably tell Adi I was trying to get out of it…" he mumbled, as he mentally ticked off all the possibilities in his head.

Finally, after three agonizing hours, he still didn't have excuse NOT to go.

Anakin sighed. He guessed he'd just have to up and do it.

--

Yoda continued down the hall. He slowly shuffled to the supply room and got what he needed.

"Hehehe… Revenge, I shall have. Suspect, Obi Wan will not…" He muttered deviously.

--

_**Friday Night – 7 PM**_

The Jedi Hall in the Temple was packed. Of course, Obi Wan thought, this _was_ a big thing. Everyone had been waiting for it all year. He had, too, until he got stuck with Yaddle. Like Anakin, he couldn't think of an excuse. Either Yaddle would yank him out, or she would use the Force to mind-trick him.

Yaddle popped out of nowhere, smiling brightly at Obi Wan. She beckoned at him with a Yoda-like claw. Obi Wan shuddered inwardly. He felt like he was going out with a female Yoda.

He managed to put these thought aside, and forced himself to grin at the waiting Yaddle. He felt sick. _Bye bye, reputation… _He thought.

--

Anakin stumbled forward as Adi yanked him along. His legs felt like jelly. He couldn't move.

Beside him, Adi chattered on incessantly, about... about what? Anakin wasn't even sure, though he knew she had been talking for the last few hours.

Suddenly, he realized that she had stopped and was glancing at him expectantly. "Ummm…" He wasn't sure what to say.

"Come one, let's go find a seat!" she sounded like she had repeated it many times before.

Anakin nodded and let Adi drag him along. As they sat down on a bench, he glanced round at the other Jedi. Shaak Ti was with Kit Fisto, with Aayla (naturally) glaring at the pair of them, while she sat with Saesee Tiin. Shaak Ti was looking rather smugly at Aayla while Aayla glowered. Saesee Tiin and Kit Fisto appeared to be a bit nervous between the two female Jedi and were trying to make small talk.

_Most like Shaak and Aayla had a fight,_ Anakin thought, _and Shaak won. _

Looking a bit farther to the right, he saw Obi Wan with Yaddle, seemingly out of place with the small Master.

Anakin hid a grin. At least Adi didn't look like Yoda-turned-female.

Another tap from Adi startled Anakin's attention back to her. She pointed at the stage, where Mace Windu was warming up his vocal chords.

"La-la-la-la-laaa-la-la-la-laaaaa!" Mace sang, giving the impression of a drowning duck.

Several Padawans and Knight booed and many of the Younglings in the crèche covered their ears politely.

Mace ignored all this, and went on to sing, "SOS by the Jonas Brothers."

Anakin had no idea who the Jonas Brothers were, but he was pretty sure that they didn't sound like Mace. However, his ears were screaming for an SOS from Mace's singing.

--

Obi Wan groaned. Mace Windu was singing, and his voice could send shocks throughout you just like Darth Sidious's Sith lightning.

Yaddle had shuffled off likewise, saying something about 'a refresher'. However, Obi Wan thought she had gone to get earmuffs.

--

Yoda limped down the hallway to Obi Wan's rooms. In his clawed hands, he clutched 3 rolls of deluxe Charming toilet paper and a pack of permanent markers. He smiled, grimly. The time had come.


	4. Jedi Chaos IV: The Hidden Peril

Jedi Chaos Part IV – Hidden Peril

**Jedi Chaos Part IV – Hidden Peril**

Summary: Anakin get beat up by girls. Obi Wan tries to help. Small things become big. Yoda wants revenge. A little random.

PG:G/ K+ for very mild violence

AN: My first fanfic online! Please be nice! No flaming please. Constructive criticism is OK. Thnx to all who reviewed! Reviews are nice :)

Disclaimer: I do not own Star Wars and its characters. I also don't own Hannah Montana, and Charming Toilet Paper.

--

Anakin glanced around desperately as Adi dragged him around the middle of the floor. Everyone _else_ seemed to be having fun-either talking to each other of just hanging around, occasionally dancing. He couldn't spot his Master anywhere.

_Lucky Obi Wan, _Anakin thought glumly. _He escaped, probably. _

He suddenly noticed Adi waiting for him, rather impatiently. He was getting the sense that he was supposed to say something. "Ummm… what?"

Adi snorted. "We're going to meet my friends, remember? They're absolutely _dying_ to meet you."

Anakin gulped. He didn't think he needed to be around _more_ Adi-like people. This was NOT good.

--

Obi Wan's mind raced. He needed a way out, and _fast_. He turned to Yaddle, who'd returned by then, and was suspiciously quiet. "May I excuse myself?" he asked politely.

Yaddle stared at him blankly, and he realized that she couldn't hear him. She had somehow managed to stuff pieces of cotton into here large ears so she could no longer hear Mace's racket ("It's called singing, you know!" shouted Mace). Obi Wan pointed at the door and then at himself and held up a finger. Yaddle nodded.

Obi Wan, relieved, slipped out the door. He closed the large, iron door to the hall. There. No more noise. He breathed. In. Out. In. Out.

Then, he thought about Anakin. Should he rescue him? _Nah_, Obi Wan thought, _It's the perfect payback for dyeing my pants pink on Siri's birthday. _

Chuckling somewhat evilly, Obi Wan made his way down the cafeteria. After listening to Mace's voice (on microphone) he wanted some peace. And also, he was hungry.

--

Anakin watched, as if in slow motion, as a tidal wave of obsessed fan-girls rushed toward him. He turned to run… and was tripped by another tidal wave of girls. He floundered, urgently seeking a way out…

--

Yoda looked at the pink marker. Then the red one. And back at the pink. _Which to use, which to use…_ _Aha! Both, I shall use. _

With an evil grin, he began his masterpiece… on the walls of Obi Wan's quarters.

--

Obi Wan chewed his hot dog. _Needs more sauce, hmmm… _

Yaddle plopped down beside him. "Boo, I say." She'd taken the cotton pieces out of her ears.

Obi Wan squeaked in surprise and choked on his hot dog. "Yaddle… er… hello."

"Hungry, I am too. Want food, I do."

"Oh..er…"

Yaddle gazed expectantly at him with those scary Yoda-like eyes. "Get some for, me, you should. You elder, I am."

Obi Wan sighed and looked longingly at his hot dog. Then, he got up and walked to the counter.

Since everyone was at the gathering, there were no chefs, so he had to make the food. Following the recipe, Obi Wan prepared the hot dog. Coming back out, he noticed Yaddle sitting innocently by his… now-empty… dish…

Sudden realization hit him: Yaddle had eaten his hot dog! He stared, in shock, at his dish, and then at Yaddle, who was looking at him like a giant puppy. He shivered. He never knew puppies would be so wicked.

"Yaddle.. Did you…"

Yaddle nodded, seemingly uninfluenced by the fact that Obi Wan was staring at her like she was crazy.

"But-but-but-I-I _licked_ it! My mouth touched it!"

Yaddle shrugged, and pointed at the hot dog. Obi Wan held it protectively close to him. "Don't worry, hot-dog, I won't let that disgusting, slimy, old, no-good…"

In a second, Yaddle had summoned the hot dog straight into her mouth with the Force.

"Old, I am?"

Obi Wan looked nervous-and slightly shocked. Who wouldn't, if they'd just had their lunch snatched away TWICE?

Glancing about anxiously, Obi Wan sat down on the edge of the bench. He hummed the Hannah Montana theme song, and jumped at small (and large) noises.

--

Anakin gasped for breath, in the suffocating mass of girls. He could feel them shouting, "Autograph!! We love Anakin!!" and so on.

He pushed and shoved, but the sea never ended… Would he ever escape?

--

Yoda drew the final mark on the wall and stepped back to admire his work. _Now, for some décor.. _he thought, as he began to TP (toilet paper) Obi Wan's rooms, furniture, and anything he could see with Charming Toilet Paper Deluxe. The parts he couldn't reach, he used the Force. Soon, only the ceiling was uncovered. Waving his arms like a demented windmill, he used to Force to direct the permanent markers in a sort of wild symphony…

--

Obi Wan walked in just in time, with Yaddle at his side, to see Anakin disappear in a mass of girls. He thought that maybe he would enjoy this, but it was actually quite pathetic watching Anakin attempt to paddle through the crowd of fans, waving wildly at him for help. He wondered if he should help… But after Anakin made a rather rude gesture to him (probably because he wasn't helping much), he decided to enjoy the show.

--

Anakin groaned. Obi Wan obviously wasn't going to lend a hand, so he'd have to get out by himself. He didn't want to hurt any of them, but he had to get out, and fast. Using the Force, he shot upwards into the sky… and landed back down on a heap of fan girls, who'd gotten the idea that he wanted to be thrown. They threw him up, and down, and up, and down… Anakin started to feel nauseous.

--

_Will Anakin ever escape? Will Obi Wan discover the mess in his room before the other Jedi do? What has Yoda done? Is he finished… Or is there a last act? And whatever happened to Adi? All in the exciting next chapter! Reviews welcome. :)_


	5. Jedi Chaos V: Jeopardy Revealed

Jedi Chaos Part V : Jeopardy Revealed

**Jedi Chaos Part V : Jeopardy Revealed **

Summary: Anakin get beat up by girls. Obi Wan tries to help. Small things become big. Yoda wants revenge. A little random.

PG:G/ K+ for very mild violence

AN: My first fanfic online! Please be nice! No flaming please. Constructive criticism is OK. Thnx to all who reviewed! Reviews are nice :)

Disclaimer: I do not own Star Wars and its characters.

--

_From the previous chapter… _

Anakin groaned. Obi Wan obviously wasn't going to lend a hand, so he'd have to get out by himself. He didn't want to hurt any of them, but he had to get out, and fast. Using the Force, he shot upwards into the sky… and landed back down on a heap of fan girls, who'd gotten the idea that he wanted to be thrown. They threw him up, and down, and up, and down… Anakin started to feel nauseous.

Bouncing up and down… up and down... And back up and down… Anakin's stomach slowly overturned.

With a VERY loud belch, Anakin emptied the contents of his stomach onto.. everyone within 10 meters range. There was screaming, shouting, stampeding, and general insanity while Anakin quickly picked himself off the floor, with a crowd of people who USED to be fans... but were now covered in goop and were now... running… toward him…

In slow motion, Anakin turned to run… His feet felt like cement, but the people behind him were so fast…. He couldn't escape…

--

Yoda used the Force to 'fly' himself back to his quarters. Grabbing a large photo album of all the Jedi he'd ever trained, he flipped all the way to 'most humiliating pictures'. Running a clawed finger down the index, he found 'Kenobi' under K. Glancing through, a slow smile spread on his face… Now all he needed was a picture of Anakin, who'd managed to avoid his wonderful picture-snapping for quite a while…

--

Obi Wan got splattered with barf. "Eugrgh…" he groaned, wiping it off his eyes so he could see. He wanted to strangle Anakin, but still… Maybe he should let the others do it…

Obi Wan stared. This was one of the strangest scenes he'd ever seen, and he'd been to a lot of places in the galaxy… Never in his life would he think that fans would actually _turn_ on Anakin or even beat him up.

He watched, fascinated, as Shaak Ti and Aayla Secura, who had been fighting only a moment before, leapt into the battle side-by-side, covered in Anakin's barf (They'd been within 10 meters, unfortunately for Anakin). Anakin went down screaming and squirming.

Obi Wan decided to help him before things got ugly. He jumped in, and did the front-crawl like those people in the Olympics ("What's the Olympics?!" shouted Anakin) over to the poor, somewhat helpless, subject of the madness. He grabbed Anakin around the neck ("Help! I can't breathe!" squeaked Anakin, struggling in vain) and hauled him to safety – straight through the door (literally). They came through with a gigantic 'SMASH!!" and splinters of wood and glass flew out.

"RUN!!" shouted Obi Wan, and that was exactly what he and Anakin did.

--

Yoda shuffled down the hall. _ How to get a picture… How to get a picture… _ He mused.

Just then, as if by some lucky (and slightly crazy) coincidence, Anakin and Obi Wan came charging up the hall, screaming "AUGHHH!!" and running at 1000 km per hour. With a slow grin, Yoda raised his camera… and snapped the picture.

"Aha…. Complete, my revenge, shall soon be…" he mumbled, limping down the hall quick as he could.

--

_The next day… 8 AM-Anakin and Obi Wan are asleep outside in the supply room because they couldn't get back to their quarters_

Anakin stretched from where he was on a pile of mats. "Mornin' Master."

Obi Wan snuffled in his sleep, and turned over.

Anakin put his ear to the door. "Master… what's that commotion?"

Obi Wan shrugged, and snored, slightly.

"It sounds like it's coming from.. your quarters' direction…Wow… what a noise…Sounds like something went off…"

Obi Wan finally sat up. "Where?!" he shouted, annoyed at being woken up.

Anakin held up his hands. "Chill, dude. Over there." he pointed.

Obi Wan sat up, and jumped to his feet, swinging the door open in one swipe. He dashed out, with Anakin right behind. Neither noticed that they were still covered in Anakin's barf from yesterday, so intent they were on getting there.

They skidded to a halt outside Obi Wan's rooms. there was a long lineup; Yoda was at the head, wearing some sort of suit, and holding up a sign: LINEUP FOR A TOUR OF THE GREAT OBI WAN"S ROOMS! 10 PER ADULT JEDI, 5 FOR PADAWANS, AND NONE FOR YOUNGLINGS: ADMISSION. PLEASE BE PREPARED.

Obi Wan stared in shock. Beside him, Anakin gagged.

Obi Wan marched right up to Yoda. "Master! What in the _SITH_ is the meaning of this?!"

Yoda wagged a finger at him. "Swear, you should not. Younglings, we have here."

"But-but this is my room!!"

"Pay you must, all the same. However, as your rooms, it is, first, you may be."

Grudgingly, Obi Wan handed over ten Republic Credits (Might as well use them now, as they won't be worth much when the Empire comes, he thought) and walked in.

What he saw was just... just plain wrong.

--

_What did Obi Wan see? What will Adi and Yaddle say? Is Yoda's Revenge complete? Or is it… What of Obi Wan and Anakin's reputations, how little they may be now. All in the next chapter!! Review welcome. ____ PS: If anyone is wondering why the chapters are less funny now, it's because I'm very busy… exams… :P.. I'll try to make it better. ___


	6. Jedi Chaos VI: The Concealed Menace

Jedi Chaos Part VI : The Concealed Menace

**Jedi Chaos Part VI : The Concealed Menace **

_Summary: Anakin get beat up by girls. Obi Wan tries to help. Small things become big. Yoda wants revenge. A little random._

_PG:G/ K+ for very mild violence_

_AN: My first fanfic online! Please be nice! No flaming please. Constructive criticism is OK. Thnx to all who reviewed! Reviews are nice :) Also, for those confused, Yoda wants revenge on Anakin because… well, you'll find out in this chapter._

_Disclaimer: I do not own Star Wars and its characters. I also don't own Sharpies and Charming Toilet Paper. And My Little Pony and Barbie and Bratz. And Hannah Montana and Barney. _

--

_From the previous chapter… _

Grudgingly, Obi Wan handed over ten Republic Credits (Might as well use them now, as they won't be worth much when the Empire comes, he thought) and walked in.

What he saw was just... just plain wrong.

Drawings of My Little Pony dotted the walls… And not on paper! Actually DRAWN on the walls… With childish like writing…

In a daze, Obi Wan wandered around. Several Barbie dolls were illustrated in his bedroom. Also, many, many Bratz sketches were in his bathroom. There were BARNEY songs on his CD player, ruining the atmosphere even worst than it already was! Hannah Montana drawings were penciled in messily at the table. But worst of all, there was a picture of HIM (Blown up on the ceiling) in boxer shorts … playing dolls (Barbie, to be exact) with-with-

With an anguished scream, he dropped to him knees. Dooku! Now everyone would know he'd played dolls with Dooku when he was fifteen!! He never thought Yoda would give his secret away after stumbling upon them playing in the gardens some years ago, but apparently, he just had…

Several Youngling squealed at his sudden cry, and Master Ali-Alann, their caretaker, quickly hustled them out.

As they went, Obi Wan heard Ali-Alann advise the children, "Now do you see what I mean when I tell you what's bad for you? Come; It's snack time."

Obi Wan felt stunned. Glancing back up, he saw a VERY recent picture; him and Anakin running from the crowd, covered in barf, and going so fast, their legs were a blur.

Anakin popped up behind him. "I FINALLY managed to sneak in.."

Gazing around, his voice faltered. "Maybe I shouldn't have come. Hey, why am _I _up there?! I haven't done anything to Yoda; you're the one who stole his girlfriend!"

At that moment, Yaddle passed by, and snapped, "His girlfriend I am not!" She glared at Obi Wan; he felt like he'd done something wrong.

"What?" he tried to ask, but Yaddle just sniffed, and pushed past him.

He turned to Anakin. "What did I do?" Anakin giggled, somewhat girlishly, and pointed. On the far wall, there was a clear message : I LOVE ADI GALLIA.

Obi Wan gulped; this could be bad.

--

_Sorry for short chapter! Busy today, I am. Must go, I do. _

_Will Obi Wan and Anakin be able to pick up the pieces of their dignity? What will Adi do when she finds out? Has Yoda finished? All in the next chapter! Reviews welcome!_

_PS: Who thinks Yoda should be finished? Yes, or no? Should I write a sequel? Yes or No?_


	7. Jedi Chaos VII: The Final Confrontation

Jedi Chaos VII: The Final Confrontation

**Jedi Chaos VII: The Final Confrontation**

_Okay, people, this is the VERY last chapter... Maybe (MAYBE) I'll write a sequel. _

_I know Qui Gon is dead, but he's alive right now in my story because I need him._

_By the way, Does anyone know if Charmisjess ever wrote the story, "Walk On"? I saw the trailer at the end of "Kite" and I really want to read it. If she did write it, could someone email me a link? Thanks. _

_Disclaimer: I don't own Star Wars and its characters. I also don't own Pizza Hut. _

--

_From the previous chapter…_

Obi Wan gulped; this could be bad.

At that very moment, Adi walked in, saying, "Annnniiiiiiieeeeeeeeeeee? Annniieeee??"

Anakin squeaked in terror, and hid behind Obi Wan; rather unsuccessfully, considering that Adi had already spotted him.

Adi wrinkled her nose. "You two smell like… barf." She looked them up and down. Anakin was the one most covered in the smelly goop; Obi Wan looked somewhat scared.

"Er… hello, Adi." Obi Wan said, nervously. "How are you today?"

Adi gave him a strange look. Anakin, who had decided, at that moment, to get revenge on Obi Wan for not helping him when he was drowning in fans, pointed at the far wall. Adi read the message. She stared at Obi Wan. She reread the message again. She looked back at Obi Wan.

Adi got a strange look in her eyes. Obi Wan backed away. "Oh no… oh no…"

Adi leapt at him; Obi Wan turned to run. Too late, he thought dimly, as Adi tackled him to the floor. "Really, Obi? I never kneeeeewwww!!"

"It's not true!" Obi Wan gasped, desperately scrabbling to get away. He shot Anakin a death glare; Anakin smiled sweetly in return. Obi Wan made the fist sign. Anakin only pointed at Adi and said, "I don't think you'll have a chance!" and walked out the door.

Adi held him pinned to the ground, and whispered into his ear, "We'll be together always!"

"Nooo!!" Obi Wan screamed, kicking away with his feet. In his frantic attempts to get away, he accidentally (or was it on purpose?) kicked Adi in the stomach. She reeled back, gasping in pain. She got this furious look on her face that reminded him of a mad bull. Obi Wan backed up some more. "This is baaaaaaaaaad!!" he yelped, as Adi yanked his ankle so he was upside down.

He squirmed desperately to free himself, but Adi's grip on him was strong. She slapped him in the face. "Ouch!" he screeched. "Lemme go!!"

And so, she dropped him onto the ground, quite unceremoniously, and walked away, cool as ice.

Obi Wan got up, burning red in the face. He turned to a group of Padawans, who were giggling childishly. "What?" he snapped. They only giggled some more, and slipped away.

Turning around, Obi Wan began to organize his thoughts. Number 1: Clean up room. Stop lineup. Number 2: Catch the troll, and beat the life out of him. Number 3: Try to regain my dignity.

Obi Wan started on Number 1. Shouting at the top of his lungs, he yelled, "Okay! Everyone out! Nothing to see here!" As the crowd hustled away, he heard someone say, "Told you he'd mad" to another. Ignoring this, he began to clean up the room. He found, to his dismay, that the pictures were drawn in permanent marker, and it was practically impossible to get it off.

Obi Wan sighed. _Maybe I should do Number 2 first,_ he decided. He glanced around. Yoda was nowhere to be seen. Hmmm…

He spotted a flash of green at the door. He dove, and tackled… Kit Fisto?! Kit Fisto wasn't Yoda!

Obi Wan let go of the Nautolan quickly. Kit got up, and shot him a look. Then, he quickly hurried away, running as if twelve Hutts were after him.

Obi Wan dashed into the hallway. Yoda couldn't be far away; he'd been at the door only moment earlier!

--

Yoda scuttled down the stairs. He knew Obi Wan would be after him soon, and he knew that if he didn't get a head start now, he was a goner.

As soon as he hopped off the last step, Yoda used the Force to propel himself into his bathroom. There, he would wait, until the final confrontation.

--

Obi Wan's brain paced itself. _Where would Yoda hide?_

Aha! His rooms. Obi Wan ran to Yoda's quarters, leaping down the stairs. He flung the door open… and saw… nothing.

Nothing! Except for…

Obi Wan noticed a little green face poke out a look at him from behind the bathroom door. It stuck its tongue out, and darted back through the door.

Obi Wan slammed into the door, just a moment too late. A note slipped out.

--

Dear Obi Wan the Stupid,

Catch me, you cannot. Strong I am. Weak, you are.

From,

The Great Yoda

--

Dear Yoda-the-oh-so-Pathetic,

If you were actually so great, you wouldn't be hiding in the bathroom, no?

From,

Obi Wan the Wonderfully Awesome

--

Dear Obi Wan-the-Arrogant,

Arrogance, the downfall of the Jedi, will be. Terribly self-conceited, you are.

From,

Yoda-the-Fantastic

--

Dear Yodie,

If I'm arrogant, what does that make you?

From,

Obi Wan-who-talks-back

--

Dear Sulky-Wan-the-Disobedient,

Lived longer than you, I have. 800+years, in fact. License and right to be smug, I have.

From,

Yoda the Superior

--

Dear Yoda-the-Old,

If you really ARE that old, shouldn't you be an elder now?

From,

Obi-Who-Is-Younger-Than-Yoda

--

Dear Obi-The-Toddler,

Weird you are. Better things to do, I have.

From,

Yoda-The-High-And-Mighty

--

Dear Yoda-The-Bizarre,

Why aren't you doing them, then?

From,

Obi Wan-Who-Thinks-Yoda-Should-Be-Voted-Out-Of-Council

--

Dear Obi-The-Jealous,

Trapped in bathroom, I am. Apparent, is it not?

From,

Yoda-Who-Thinks-Obi Wan-Is-Dim

--

Dear Yoda-The-Brainless,

Duh, you're trapped in the bathroom. I'm asking why you don't come out and be a man!

From,

Obi Wan-Who-Is-Sensible

--

Dear Obi Wan-The-Sarcastic,

Knew that, I did. Man, I am not.

From,

Yoda-The Awesome

--

Dear Yoda-Who-Doesn't-Make-Sense,

If you're not a man, what are you? A woman?

From,

Obi Wan-The-Greater

--

Dear Obi Wan-The-Dense,

Male, I am. Human, I am not. No, Duh.

From,

Yoda-the-High-Class

--

Dear Yaya,

Troll-face.

From,

Obi Wan

--

Dear Sissy-Wan, Queen of Idiots,

Dork, you are.

From,

Yoda, High Council member, and Supreme Grand Master of The Jedi Order/Council

--

Dear Master Yoda,

What are you Grandmaster for, if you can't face me, Queen of the Weaklings?

From,

Obi Wan the puny

--

Dear Obi Wan,

True it is, that puny, you are. Alright, come out, I will.

From,

GRANDmaster Yoda

--

With a devious look, Obi Wan stepped back from the door, and waited.

A moment later, Yoda's head popped out. Obi Wan pounced.

--

Dear Obi Wan,

Why did you have to beat Yoda up so badly?

From,

Your Master,

Qui Gon Jinn

--

Dear Master,

He asked for it. Don't believe me? Look in my room.

From,

Obi Wan the avenged

--

Dear Obi,

I mean, I don't blame you, but why'd you have to cut him up limb by limb, and drop him into Mace's rooms all bloody and everything? All that racket (from both Yoda and Mace) is bad for my sensitive ears, you know.

From,

Qui Gon

--

Dear Master,

He messed up my room, Master. My area of peace and comfort. My haven of great sanctuary. My-

--

Dear Obi the Descriptive,

Alright! I get the idea! And yes, he DID do that to me once (Yaddle had a crush on me, who can blame her) and NO, I didn't cut him up. I dropped him off the Empire State Building.

From,

Qui Gon Who Understands

--

Dear Master-Who's-Been-Through-It-Too,

What's the Empire State Building?

From,

Obi Wan-The Confused

--

Dear Obi Wan-the-Dense,

It's on Earth. It's very tall. Oh, and Earth is the blue-and-green planet. The one that has good hotdogs.

From,

Qui Gon-The-Wise

--

Dear Qui Gon,

Yeah, I know that place! They have good pizza too! Wanna meet me at Pizza Hut in an hour or so?

From,

Obi Wan-the-Hungry

--

Dear Obi Wan-,

Ok. Just don't pig yourself out, and could you actually use your manners? Now, can we stop writing notes to each other?

From,

Qui Gon

--

Dear Quiggy,

Yes.

From,

Obi Wan-The-Starved

--

_Well, that was the last chapter. Now_, _on with the trailer!_

**Who will win… **

_Two lightsabers clash, _

_Someone screams, _

**In a battle of wills, **

_A dice rolls, _

_Something falls to the floor, _

**Testing the even the most serene, **

_Shaak Ti clings to thin air, and drops into a bottomless pit,_

_Aayla Secura screams hysterically,_

**It an endless competition,**

_Anakin swipes his lightsabre;_

_Obi Wan jumps and parries._

_**(Blacks out)**_

**Jedi Games… **

**Coming to June, 2008!**


End file.
